I walk the road to happiness everyday in hopes that one day I may arrive. That didn’t sound right. I am happy, I really am but I guess like most people I tend to bring attention to those things that make me unhappy more than the things that make me happy. All those things that make me unhappy happen to be people.
There are things we know and things we don’t. The things we know we take for granted. The things we know we get bored with and just kinda let them be. The things we don’t know we think we have to know. If we don’t know them they disrupt our happiness. In some cases, they disrupt our happiness to the point we get angry and restless. I’m not this guy but this guy makes me unhappy. I know more of what makes me unhappy than what does. Again, all those things that make me unhappy are people.
I have been accused quite often as not caring. What makes this matter worse and angers the accuser is that I agree. I don’t care. You care that I don’t care and you care that I care. This has baffled me my whole life. I have never tried to figure people out. I have tried to figure computers out and that just ended up pissing me off. Which goes right back to people pissing me off. People built computers and for the life of me I don’t know why they made it so complicated.
Me: So my music is on my phone but it’s gone from my computer?
Me: Why can’t you transfer it from my phone and put it back on my computer?
Apple: I don’t know what to tell you.
When it comes to what people do I really don’t care. I don’t mean this in a negative way or heartless way but why would you even want me to care? Whatever you do with your life is your business. I believe in the philosophy of “Do what you want but harm no one”. If you really want to make yourself miserable, try and figure people out. People are really messed up nowadays and it will only get worse.
When I first moved to New York I was in the hospital with two anxiety attacks and eventually developed a case of the shingles. When I sat down with the doctor, his first assumption was that I was working too much. No, work doesn’t bother me. I love what I do for a living and could be there all day. Then what was the real problem? What was fueling my anxiety? I had known the answer for a long time, yet I had never said it out loud. I looked at the doctor and said in a very calm voice, “I fucking hate my coworkers”. The doctor actually threw his pen up in the air and fell back in his chair and blurted “People are assholes. Get over it!”. He was absolutely right. And that’s exactly what I did. I started meditating and spending more time figuring myself out. I needed and have spent the last ten years figuring out my own actions and attitude. Trying to figure out peoples actions and attitudes was contributing to my stress. Well, no more.
Ever since I got this dose of real medicinal advice I have trucked forward. Don’t get me wrong, I see things people do everyday and am baffled by their behavior but I don’t try to figure it out. People are cruel and downright nasty. If I tried to figure out why people do the things they do. I would be back in the hospital with an anxiety attack or painful shingles.
I may not know what makes you happy. Everyday you must look for something to focus on that makes you happy. Sometimes you may have to go inside. It’s a journey and you should enjoy it. I do know funny people and funny things make me happy. I also know trying to figure people out, makes me unhappy. So I don’t even bother. I just walk away from negativity and cruelness. It’s not needed nor wanted in my life. This is a start.
Look up and out into the world.
“Until we learn the lessons inherent in unpleasant experiences,
they will continue to hold power over us,
and we will feel compelled to repeat them”