Yes, I’ve been there. I was extremely over weight, OK obese, topping out at 325 pounds when I was only 18 years old. I would sweat just at the thought of going outside in the summer, clothes didn’t fit, I was uncomfortable all the time, out of breath at a simple task and my stomach was a wreck most the time. That was 20 years ago and I’ve since maintained a comfortable and what they would consider a healthy weight but it’s something I have to be conscious of everyday.
Weight loss is a problem that people think is the easiest to solve, yet those that have been there know it’s probably one of the hardest. Being on both sides I can tell you that it is extremely difficult. Also I can tell you it is extremely gratifying. The only problem is I don’t know if I would call it an accomplishment because you’re never done. If you’ve been overweight your whole life or just been overweight at a point in your life, you understand that it is something you will battle until the day you die. You and I both know that we could go back to our 325 pounds in a matter of months. I know I could. That’s what scares me.
Every day, every meal, every piece of food or beverage that I see or hold in my hand is a reminder that I used to be overweight. Why? I like to eat. I want it all. This is the problem that society or skinny people don’t understand. I over eat. It doesn’t matter if it’s a salad. When you go to a restaurant and you order the entree, they ask you what sides you want with that. Why don’t they ask me if I want the side of mac and cheese with my salad? Salads don’t come with sides? That’s bullshit. This is my and most overweight peoples mentality. We feel we are getting less. If I order a salad, it better be huge. This is weight loss problem 101. It doesn’t matter if it’s healthy or not, I want a lot of it. Like a fighter, the meal isn’t done until I can’t take anymore and I tap out.
Don’t tell me it’s depression or “What did your Mom do to you?” either. My Mom loved the hell out of me and I had the happiest childhood ever and from what I’ve seen most people would be jealous of. A good friend of mine, whom I love to share fat stories with, said to me “When were we the happiest? When we were fat!” Yes, yes we were. Food was family get togethers, picnics, BBQ’s, out with friends, Holidays, farmers markets, Nana’s Macaroni and Cheese, you looked forward to all this. It wasn’t depressing, it was fun. Yeah, I eat when I’m happy, I eat when I’m sad. I’m overweight because I like to eat.
It’s an addiction that gets talked of jokingly, like I am now, but it’s serious. Our nation is extremely overweight, kids are huge, developing countries heart disease and diabetes is at a shocking rise. Have we found an answer? Not quite. I have a theory but you won’t want to hear it. I have read numerous articles, books and watched all these food documentaries and I can’t digest any of it. It’s all confusing and finger pointing. It can be hard to lose weight when doctors tell you one thing, then change their minds and the food companies tell you another and then FDA says something that contradicts both doctors and companies. We want less government but we want that same government approving pills for diabetes, depression, heart disease and many other ailments.
Losing weight and keeping it off can be done. Yet, it is a battle until the day you die. Why do you think so many people either can’t lose weight or they put it all back on? It’s a struggle. Every. Single. Day. It’s the not having certain foods in your house. It’s skipping out on social events because you can’t control yourself. It’s the mind saying “One piece of pie won’t hurt.” Yeah, but it’s the one piece of pie every single day along with the pop and other processed foods. I wish I had a miracle formula for you. I wish I had it for myself.
We’ll talk more…. I wish you all the best of luck and love.
“The hardest part about letting go is finally realizing that there wasn’t much left to hold on to”